Oh and your Daisuke pic makes me wish I had more DNAngel. Or at least more Satoshi. One or the other. *skips away*

 
I blog about personal thoughts...nobody cares. I get into pairings...suddenly there are "perks" about.

*cries* Spoilers! Noooo! And I was trying to be good with this series. I haven't even visited a fansite. I always spoil myself with anything I watch, but I was trying so hard this time. Alas, because of my big mouth, I have failed once again. *hangs head* On the plus, based on the information that's been provided, yes I think I shall like Hakkai/Gojou. Cutting off hair? How sweet!

As for belittling "the froggie," I always found that little toy cute and adorable and loved that scene because it added some humor to an otherwise dour and melancholy moment. Fuuma's warning the kid surprised me and I love to be surprised in a series because I hate when I can predict every friggin' scene. So "the frog" is cute, but when you compare his advantages as an accessory to a HOT character to Satoshi...Hmm...let us think.
Satoshi: cute, intelligent, obsessive, complete with alter ego who is beyond sexy, wears cute little glasses even though he has excellent vision, soooo adorable when sad, has yet to disappear from existence.
"The Frog": stuffed, has honor of sitting on Fuuma's head, cute, is now MIA.
*does math* SATOSHI!!!! *nods head* Definitely Satoshi and Krad! *rushes off to steal Krad*

BTW, I so totally know I took this comment out of context but Nayami is delving into the crack right now and doesn't give a damn! Huzzah!

Off to sketch more notes about the "kitties." I think Yuuto-neko and Kamui-neko got into the catnip and Sora-neko has fallen in the fishbowl. That's never good. ^____^

 
Ummm...people. Xanatos/Owen. Excuse me to bring up old terminology but...Le DUH! Come on, there even was that one line where Owen says, "I never played the straight man before." And how he sacrificed his own hand so that Xanatos didn't make a bad mistake and petrify himself. And Puck. Puck alone is soooooo gay.

Hello Amelia! Hinoto/Daisuke fan, huh? Interesting choice. Never much liked Hinoto since she's a real bitch and caused Sora-chan to get hurt and Sei-chan to get...well...dead. But Dai-kun was always cute with his whole "NOT KAMUI" bit. The worse part is I started to like him the best right before he died. Damn you Clamp!

And pretty Saiyuki fanart. I care little for Gojou since I haven't got that much into the series yet. But Hakkai! *grins* I will admit that I can see the potential for slashing him with Gojou though. I just haven't seen enough to have specific evidence that all my slashable favorites must have. It doesn't have to be much but it has to be alluded to somehow in the actual work. Hell, even certain looks characters give to each other are enough for me.

As for the current convo that is ensuing amongst bloggies, I definitely second the nomination of Krad for most pounceable. Yes, he's semi-homicidal too, but hey he is hot hot hot! Plus, he comes with his own Satoshi which is always a plus. What does another certain nominee come with? A frog? Big whoop. As for Nokuro, too nice for my taste. Besides, I don't want to break up him and Suoh. I respect my zany pairings.

I agree with you. Aoki isn't boring as some may claim, it's just that unlike some other Clamp charas, we are given so much information about him that it isn't possible to warp him beyond recognition with off-the wall character traits, which seems to be the fad as of late. Also, aside from his relationship issues with Karen and his now dead nephew, Aoki doesn't have much in the angst department and most X fans just can't relate to that. For X fans in general, charas have to possess a quirk that makes people go "hmmm" or "wow." Aoki is a sweetie and very huggable, but he just lacks this quirk. See, even Keiichi has his uber-genkiness. Though, Aoki could have something that I may have missed. Correct me if you have run across something noteworthy. BTW, I see Sora-chan's quirks as his incite, his ability to stay cheerful, and his extreme devotion.
Aoki also unfortunately has a wife, which is also a death warrant in the fan world. Hard to have fun with someone who's already settled down. Then again, so is Saitou and he still gets some action. I guess I have to think about this some more.

Dang, must go to work now. I probably should have read those stories for tomorrow instead of blogging. Welp, I'm an idiot.

 
Oh look, Nayami actually did something with her time for once. I finished Chp.2 of Clamp Kitty Campus and posted it on ffnet. (I need to strangle my Kamui-neko!) Yeah! Too bad I won't be able to work on any more of that or Chp.38 until my Journalism and Asian Art History term papers are done. *bangs head against desk*

 
Oh, and I must say that I feel quite honored to become one of your "sluts/hoes." ^_~

 
I've got mad work to do so I really shouldn't be blogging but I feel that I must because I'm actually happy for the first time this week. I don't even really know why. All I know is that...I NEED MORE SIX FEET UNDER PICCIES!!! Must have more Rico, Keith, Nate, and even David. Must must must! I mean, they're not that great looking ('cept for Nate ^_^) but they all just have the best pictures out of the whole cast. I think Six Feet Under will have the honor of being added to my wall o' anime posters at my house as soon as I can find the poster that I really want. I want the pretty gray one that flashes across the scene during the previews for the next episode. That one has the whole Fisher family plus Keith, Brenda, Rico, and I think one of Ruth's beaus.

Secondly, I got review for my novel as usual. I just love being told that my characters actually have depth and are mildy intriguing. I do, seriously. ^______^

But on the whole, my weekend wasn't that great. I saw practically all my family, which is never good. I wanted to bitch-slap my grandmother, strangle both of my aunts, and kick my sister in the teeth. I didn't even get to watch my new volume of Saiyuki. I really want to see more of Hakkai. He's my favorite so far. But I did get to watch FruBa with Celes so that was cool. Ayame is too funny, though Haru still gets all my huggles. ^^

So before I avoid the net for the rest of the night to get my hw done for once, I think I will try to finish Chp.2 of my kitty-fic. I even took notes of my Louis and Buffy at home so I could write better. Fat Louis-baby doesn't like jumping for her "mommy" though and usually just gives me that "I want to sleep,bitch" look. But Buffy...heh, Buffy is just too damn funny for her own good. She can't even walk without strutting and she has to slap her tail around every step of the way. Guess who she's the model for? And I watched Celes' crack-kitty, Quentin, for a while but he wasn't being as spazzy as usual. That's okay though since Subaru-neko isn't in Chp.2 that much.

 
Adding new linkie.

Yes, Nayami is a hypocrite to the extreme. Who cares? F/K!!!! Long live F/K! And one of my favorite necking piccies too. *purrrr*

 
Must try to get as much of kitty-fic done before I have to go home for the weekend since I will be studying, angsting, and generally being miserable the whole time.

In other news, finding out the Sei-chan's shadow is behind my new favorite Subby pic just made me love it even more. I even enjoyed Asuka summaries for once. I think Nataku is being decent for once and I can actually like it without having to scream at how confused/pathetic it is. I think I'll be nice to my Nataku in my ficcy just because I always feel so bad for it.

As for the whole clothes switching idea I've been reading about on the bloggies...one word: *HISS!!!!* Oh and *SCRATCH! RIP! YOWL! HISS!*

Yuuto-neko: You know, I think you're getting too much into this kitty thing.
Sei-chan: You shut up. She's defending my Subaru-kun's fidelity.
Yuuto-neko: Um...aren't you dead?
Sei-chan: *evil grin* Does it really matter?
Yuuto-neko: *sweatdrop*

Aside from that distraction, I totally missed all of my Asian Art History classes this week and most of Econ. I did some Econ notes from the net but I got tired and I'll probably have to find a way to work on more when I'm home this weekend. Add that to working on refined plot ideas for Chp.38, reading more about Briton Hadden and refinining my research, doing more boring Asian Art museum studies, and beating myself in the head with my journalism book.

 
I am going to kill the student in my class who accused my character Cadell of sounding "homoerotic!" It is possible for someone to "speak softly and try to meet another's eyes" without being gay. It happens between characters all the time and yes, fangirls love to slash them like crazy, but other people never notice it. I think he just was looking for something. Well, if he wants "homoerotic," he can read Psychosis Post Chp.29, that will have all the slashy goodness he wants. Cadell and Arlen are sooo not gay. Lucian and Dominic on the other hand.....Aside from that, I think my second fic workshop went rather well and people didn't criticize me so much and actually bought my style of writing, except for my frequent overkill of description. Oh, and I wish they would quit bitching about the way I do dialogue. If I want someone to sound whiny, yet still want them to be an arrogant little bitch. I can do it! People don't talk the same way all the time. One moment, someone may seem playful and crazy-like, and then when a certain subject is brought up, they may get solemn and serious. Half the things they pointed out as my mistakes I did on purpose! I like how I do my dialogue so they can just shove it. Though I will admit, in this story, I did tell too much through speaking than I should have. *sigh*

 
I got a B on my stupid Jour quiz and I actually studied hard for it. I even knew all the really hard questions that everybody else missed. The only problems I didn't know were the ones that the bitch professor never discussed or the ones that she gave us the wrong information about. Shit! I even skipped 2 classes this morning so that I would have enough sleep to study properly. And I went to bed at 12. That's an all-time early record for me. I hate hate hate college.

I'm soo depressed that I think I'll work on my kitty fic now. I don't feel like working on Chp.38 since it will probably just depress me even more and I don't even know whose perspective to write it in. I don't think Tye has been getting enough talking time. Maybe I'll just have him observe his little Guardians and make oblivious comments as usual. As for the x-kitties, I'll have Fuuma-neko cause some trouble and have Sora-neko being a cute widdle hero-type kitty-cat. Umm, I think Sei-neko and Subaru-neko can sit this chapter out. Oh and I should add in Satsuki-neko and Nataku-neko, shouldn't I? Hmmm....

 
I don't care if Subaru is in the fucking Asuka or not! I just wanna know who is or at least one tiny glimpse of what happened in it. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE TELL US! I need to know because I need something to focus on besides the supreme asstastic (Celes' word) quality of my life. BTW, though I love the Subaru piccy, I kind of hate reading about him in X because Clamp always manages to do something to his character that pisses me off.

 
Warning: Nayami is nuts and doesn't know what she obsesses over anymore. Nayami is also having a shitty life so she shall jump from one side of the fence to the other whenever she wants. BTW, I don't condone selfish shallow swooning like i am about to engage in. But I'm depressed and stunned so nyah!

Okay, I'm not reposting the pic 'cause everyone's already seen it ten dozen times, but I must say. Hellooooo Subaru-kun. Welcome back! Even if it's just in this pic and even if you have no personality and even if I want to bludgeon you to death on a daily basis, this piccy just makes me squeal and wanna get ahold of Asuka just so I can huggle the piccy for hours. And the hair! The hair! That is so totally BoySlut TB Subaru! *bounces* I wanna be a happy fangirl again for at least the rest of tonight. Then, I shall return to my actual life. But...*looks at piccie again*...oh how I have missed classic Subaru.

Oh and on a similar not, I WANT TO KNOW WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED IN THE ACTUAL ISSUE! Did it have Karen/Aoki? Did it have Sorata or Arashi? Did it have Kamui? Did it have Sakurazukamori Subaru? I want answers, dammit! One piccy is not enough to sate my desire though....Damn, does it come close.

*hangs head in shock at own words and returns to hole, mumbling incoherently and huggling piccy some more*

 
Warning: I am not in a good mood right now so I'm going to be bitter. Deal.

Okay, it's official. I don't hate my life. I hate how everything I can possibly imagine loves to fuck with it. I want to kick my sister's ass and I want to just screw the rest of this week and go home. I doubt I'll even be coming back to UMD next semester. I hate money too. And with all these fucking tests clammed up within one week, I can't fucking concentrate. I have to study again after work and now I just feel sick. I hate it when my dad cries. I hate listening to everyone else complain about their superficial shit problems in my class, or in my dorm, or on the net. Usually, I don't mind and actually enjoy them. But now, they just make me want to hit someone. I don't want to have to worry about registration or paying off my blood-thirsty university, or failing my term paper or anything of that. I want to worry about what matters and I can't even get the chance to do that because I can barely think anymore. I can't even get really depressed now. All I am is angry and jealous of practically everyone else around me because they get to fuss and nit-pick over little things that really don't matter in the big picture. I can't even calm down enough to write anymore. All I keep doing is turning to the net like I'm some sort of addict. I barely even look at what I read anymore. I should be studying. But I don't. I just scan through fic after fic, not even enjoying them. Just looking for something that will keep me from thinking. I just wish this fucking week would end so I could go home!

 
Oh yes, and I'm adding this person to my blog links. Why? Because I am INSANELY addicted to her original work Divinitas and I stalk her blog everyday in hopes that she will announce posting a chapter. That and she draws funny X piccies and has crazy anime rambles like all the rest of my blog linkies.

 
Have to call Dad after work tonight and discuss...things. Not looking forward to it. Don't know if I'll get any fanfic writing done today. But in the meantime....

I know this is shameless flattery, but I love these two pics so much that I must have everyone who ventures to my blog see them. Don't worry, they weren't drawn by me. I'd never inflict that sort of torture on anyone. ^_^

BoySlut Subaru!
I lurve Ryuuichi's eyes and his kick-ass hairstyle!

Sorry, that I may seem like a complete moron, Celes, but I'm not feeling very good today and I want to revel in the few things that give me joy. So why shouldn't everyone else enjoy them as well?

 
Failed Econ test....but so did everyone else. Here's hoping he curves the grades.

That is all.

 
Well, I feel like shit. I'm going to fail my Econ test and I'm depressed out of my mind, but since I already spent most of the night burdening my friends with my troubles, I shall entertain myself with pointless fic role-playing. Writing is the one thing I use to clear my head and believe me, my head needs some serious clearing right about now. *sigh*

I begin pretending that my chara creations actually exist

Nayami: Great! Now that I've finally finished Chp. 37. I have lost the kitties.
Luce: Is this one? *holds up Sora-neko* I like him. He's nice and cuddly and he doesn't bite like the one Tye got his hands on.
Tye: Ow! All I wanted to do was pet the pretty black kitty-cat. *Sei-neko hisses and swipes at him*
Sei-neko: < Subaru-neko is mine! >
Lucian: Heh heh. That cat sure gave you the proverbial bitch-slap.
Sei-neko: < Besides, you're just a refined version of Kamui anyway. So I'll be damned if I let you play with my Subaru-kun. >
Tye: Hey! That was mean!
Yuuto-neko: < But true. > *rubbing against Erik* < Oooh, a lady who looks like a gentleman. The best of both worlds. >
Erik: I hate cats.
Lucian: Why doesn't that surprise me? *huggles Yuuto-neko* Don't worry, I'll play with you. Here you and the tabby can play together. *huggles both Yuuto-neko and Sora-neko*
Yuuto-neko: < So we're together again, ne? >
Sora-neko: *sweatdrop* < Fun. >
*yowling in the background*
Nicky: Something black and furry ran over the paper I was reading.
Tye: Sounds familiar.
Nicky: What pray tell...is this doing here? *holds up Subaru-neko*
Tye: Yay! You found the black kitty!
Lucian: Wow! Check out those eyes! Who needs red when you can have both green and gold?
Sei-neko: < Mine! >
Nicky: Well, he's certainly possessive.
Tye: *turning to Lucian* Yeah. Remind you of anyone? *evil glare at Nicky*
Nicky: Hey, I've never marked someone as my prey or trapped them inside a tree.
Tye: Yet.
Yuuto-neko: *snickers*
Lucian: Guys, I think the kitty was referring to the black one's eye. It really is his.
Sei-neko: < Forget the eye! Give me Subaru-kun! >
Nicky: You should know kitties. I don't get along well with small fluffy creatures. *growls*
Sora-neko: *clinging to Lucian with his claws* < You can't let him hurt us. We're the funny ones like you. We've got to stick together. >
Yuuto-neko: < Alas, this one is a main character. He doesn't have to worry about being killed off. >
Nayami: Don't be too sure.
Yuuto-neko: *shaking with laughter* < Aww, looks who thinks she can pull a Clamp. >
Nayami: Whoever found the kitties better put them back in their proper room.
Lucian: Don't wanna.
Nayami: Why ever not? They just steal your spotlight.
Lucian: Good. I don't want you to write about me anyway.
Sora-neko: *looks up* < Hmm, and why is that? >
Lucian: Because she's going to be meaaaan to me! I read her plot sketches.
Nayami: I'm gonna be mean to Nicky too.
Nicky: Yes, and that's supposed to make him feel better.
Nayami: Fine, play with the kitties for a few more days. You're all only delaying the inevitable.
Tye: Hmm, if she's going to be mean to the Guardian boys, does that mean that I'm off the hook for a while?
Lucian: Lucky S.O.B.
Nicky: *with Sei-neko on his shoulder and Subaru-neko in his lap* Uh, could someone lend me a hand here.
Lucian: *huggles nekos again* Busy.
Nicky: Be that way then. That's what I'm going to tell you the next time you want to....
Nayami: Ehem, that will be quite enough of that, thank you. I'm tired and going to bed. Make sure not to lose the kitties.
Tye: Oh look another kitty. *grabs Kamui-neko* You're so tiny.
Kamui-neko: < Argh! Copyright infringement! > *hisses and scratches Tye, then runs away*
Tye: What did I do?

End nonsensical jibberish and re-enter normal world.

*looks above*
Yeesh, I really need a fic blog so people don't think I've lost my mind. *adds that to list of things to do this week*

 
Que ironico!
My server recovers just as I finish Chp.37. Did I hear someone say omen? Well, it was technically supposed to include more but it's already 24 pages and I think that's enough for now. Besides, Chp. 38, aside from its angst didn't look like it was going to be that long. It could use a little fleshing out in the begninning. A dose of what we call...pre-angst. ^_^

But oh dear, what have I done to my happy couple? If I hadn't already planned out all this chaos a month ago, I would have suspected that this was just a side-effect of my feelings/mental state as of late. Alas no, it was supposed to be that upsetting. Now for the tricky part, can I truly handle the complete evilness I must utilize in order to pull off Chp.38 in all its angsty and extremely depressing glory? Sure, I can!
*shakes head* I've been reading Clamp for too long.

 
Well, it appears service is still down AND NOW the fire alarm is on the fritz...again! Let's count how many times it went off at 9 in the morning....6! Ooooh, new record. I think about the 4th time, everybody got pissed, including the RAs and just decided to say "Fuck it! I'm going in my room and putting on my headphones." As for me, I'm all "I'll just go downstairs and waste time on the student computers since I'll too incoherent to write anything worth well."

Oh and crazy student provided me with the Quote of the Week since I haven't done any in such a long time.

"This fucking thing had better be burning down because if it ain't, I'm going to choke the son of a bitch. And not the nice choke either. You know, in the sexual way. Right now, I'm gonna...Fuck Ryan, you have donuts! Give me one, bitch!"

Yep, that was the highlight of the moment.

As for my zany mumbles last nigth.

Leareth, I'm a very neurotic and highly excited person. I always think the worse case scenario and flip out over the tiniest little things. Sorry if I said anything stupid.

Audrey, I'm very happy that my gushing and freak-out could make someone happy. And as I said, I have always enjoyed your blog because of all the S/S fun it has always provided. I may not be an actively participating fangirl but any S/S fanstuff just brings out joygasms in this unstable person.

 
Pointless fiction rambling again. Both fan and original.

Hmmm, the kitties seem to have stolen my Chp. 37 dialogue from my brain and made off with it. I can guess which ones are the culprits. *looks at a certain arrogant Angora and a decievingly sweet Chartreux* Anyway, I meant what I said about not writing anything else until I get some time for my original writing. Now, be nice kitties or I shall let Wolf play with you and unless you have long red hair, he's not being to be very nice.

Speaking of not nice, I have learned my lesson. Erik and Luce should never ever ever be allowed in the same room at the same time. It's like putting Season 2 Angel and Xander together. Chaos shall ensue. Actually, it also makes me think of certain incompatible manga/anime charas, but I think I have said enough about that for one day. I suppose I should be using my net downtime to finish that chapter since all I have to do is add to more parts. One will be easy because it's nice and slashy and has computers. But the other will be difficult because it involves plot manipulation and I sooo suck at that, especially if I haven't set up enough hints or have forgotten certain elements. Oh, why can't I just screw plot and play with my characters? I guess I'm just neurotic.
End fic rambling

Oh and I honestly would have tried to oekaki today had not my ISP decided to screw me. I was thinking about drawing a cross. Not very creative but I figure I can't mess that up too badly.

I hope this whole *rawr* issue doesn't make Leareth, Audrey, or Taryn stop blogging. Audrey puts up nice S/S piccies and listening to her ramble, even when I think it sounds nutty, is always good wholesome psychotic fun. And I want Taryn's Closer. Not as much as I want Leareth's Shadows of the Moon though. And yes, I realize that other people are involved in this. But I shall literally break down and cry if any of this shit chases any of the mentioned three away. Wait, screw crying. I will have a spastic fit and believe me, those are not pretty.

*huggles X* Why must you cause so much controversy by your mere existence? You don't even make any friggin' sense. Yet, we can't help but love you. Now hurry the fuck up with your next bit of "storyline" so we can finally have something else to discuss. Something constructive for a change. Hey, there's an original concept. =P

 
On a different topic, to anyone of the five people who actually cares to converse with me, my service provider in the dorm is down so my internet capabilities are like...nil. Sorry guys.

 
Writing fiction but just feel impelled to say this.
Note: This is totally not a rant. It's simply a fact.

Ehem, I personally don't care who gets slashed with who. If I don't like it, I don't read it. I mean, have you seen some of them on HP or BtVS fandom? Talk about ewwwww. Anyway, as said before people write what they think is fun and what they like, so more power to them. You want SMUT w/o plot. Go ahead. You want plot without sex go ahead. You want a lil' of column A and column B, go ahead. People who like your stuff will read and have just as much fun as you do. Yes, people are going to argue. My question is why do you care if you're just doing it for fun? Or are you really doing it for the attention and the notoriety? (Owww, I know that was harsh! *shrugs* I'm not a very nice person when I just wake up.)

Anyway, my only MAJOR problem with *cough*fandom*cough* nowadays isn't the fights or the mudslinging or even the animosity. It's simply this. People aren't willing to venture outside the new 'norm' anymore. You know what I'm talking about. I visit Clampesque and perfectly good stories that have either stuck with the old ideas or tried a few different but not "norm" ideas get no responses. No, this definitely does not mean that they should stop writing. (This is not directed at anyone. I've heard this complaint from many a fanfiction writer.) Far from it! Write more! Yes, I know we all write because we want someone to tell else what they think: be it good or bad. But we also write because we want to show others what we like. Just because there are few/no responses doesn't mean that it's bad, though it may mean it's not (god, I wish I didn't have to use this world because of the emotional baggage it brings with it) popular. Some people may not want to read anything besides *pick a name* slashing, but that's their choice. You can't please everybody. I guess I just wish that more people would look for a bit more in fanfiction than just some sex. It is possible you know.

For example, one of my favorite and at the same time most disgusted authoress is Poppy Z. Brite. She writes some very twisted stuff. She also writes very involved sex scenes. But you know what? She has plot intermingled with all of it. That's what makes it good. Now, don't get me wrong some SMUT fics have fine plot, but then there are some that seem to just be there for the sex. That's okay too, but it would be nice to have chunks of fics like these mixed with those that have a bit more substance. Of course, that's just my preference and most may not agree. (I bet very few do because I'm one of the few people that view characters above EVERYTHING else.)

And I won't lie, if you can convince me through your skill of writing that a pairing CAN work (and not just with canon), I will read ANYTHING, provided that you have done a damn fine job with the characterization. I don't even care what changes are made, just give it enough support. I am at heart a hopelessly addicted slash fan and I jump at the slash to read something makes me go "Wow!"

But really there are other options that could work besides dare I say......it tossing around characters with the Big Four. If that's what you want to write, go for it. But readers in general should stop being SHEEP. Though some may be stuck to their ways after just entering the fanfiction realm this year and encountering nothing but the "norm" which they have taken to be the generally accepted fanfiction criteria. I must admit that a few fans are always stuck in their ways. I love Sorashi so it took some fans a long time to convince me that Yuuto/Sorata wouldn't totally suck. And how did they do this? Through a well-written fic. Same thing with YnM, I like Tsuzuki/Hisoka, but some great writing showed me the possibilities of Tatsumi/Tsuzuki. And by god, if one writer could really convince me thorugh their writing that either Sei-chan/Subby/Fuuma/Kamui and *any other possible character including each other* work well off each other, I'd probably enjoy that as well. Frankly, it just hasn't happened. Though I am a very hard person to convince. Yes, I am a snobby old-school twit who's been here since 1998. I like old school pairings. I don't think I'm better than anyone else. I just want others to be given a chance that's all.

BTW, this whole explanation was directed toward fanfic READERS! Writers just write what they want, it's the readers who set the scenario in place. Hate to that, but it's a fact of life. No, I'm not blaming anyone persay. I'm just saying that if readers wouldn't just give the cold shoulder to any fic that isn't the "norm," most people would not be as angry as they are nowadays.

*looks up*
Was that a rant after all? Whoopsie! Myyyy bad. ^_____________^

PS: If you sat through this rant and aren't busy saying how I'm just being a whiny bitch, click on anyone of the above paragraphs for a fun surprise. I used to be so addicted to this.

 
On a similar note, I must say that seeing that Rules of Engagment actually got a review made my day. I wrote a short story and someone read it. Wow. Though, I think Sessions is much better and that it should get more attention. Though it won't because it's on ffnet and ffnet always ignores the short stories. Rules was more of a BS thing for class, though I do enjoy Cadell. He is such an asshole! hehehe.I just know that story is gonna get torn up in workshop because it has a whole bunch of plot holes and the only thing good about it is the characters. But that's the way with most of my writing, though I am trying to avoid it on Psychosis. I don't know if I'm succeeding.

 
I am just stunned. I managed to get an 85 on my Asian Art History test. Well, with a little extra credit, I should be able to pull off a B and maintain my shaky GPA. I want to keep my 3.9 but I'll be happy with anything above a 3.5. *crosses fingers*

X-kitty fic has its newest chapter up. Didn't get to add a few kitties, mainly most of the Angels. I'll get to them later. I'm too busy with the others. *huggles puffball Yuuto-neko and hissing Sei-neko* Well, I'll write more on Monday I suppose.

And GW rant is getting put on hold because I want to let things cool down before I start flinging the words canon and fanon around again. Plus, I am actually working on my original ficcy. I am not writing anything else until I have a good portion of it done. NOTHING!

And now for the unavoidable SOCIAL BLOGGIN'

Emiko, I love your new Brody and Gavin story. I'm so sorry that I didn't read it until today. I've been messing around all week and wasting time when I should be doing other things (writing, schoolwork, checking on finances). But I reviewed it as soon as I read it and I insist that YOU MUST WRITE MORE. Do not make me jump Gavin and hold him hostage until you do because I assure you I am not a stable person and might just do that. ^_~

Kerikeri, it's good to know that someone actually agrees with one of my ideas for once. Most people just assume I'm talking out of my ass whenever I rant. And I love your new layout. Moulin Rouge is one of the best musicals ever. I especially love the picture you used. That just happens to be one of my favorite scenes since it's so emotional...and colorful at the same time. It also happens to be the scene just before everything spirals into sadness. ;_;

I love your realistic drawings. I want to see the rest of the Dragons. I'd also like to see some fic action from you soon. *hopeful look*

I can understand why YOU wish to analyze your own work, but I personally think that all of your fiction is great. And though I'd understand if you never finished Shadows of the Moon, I'd go into happy shock if you released at least one more chapter. Of course, I always enjoy reading your YnM stuff in the meantime. I love the way you write Tatsumi. I don't really like him in the manga/series, but I love him in your fanfiction. Go figure.

Kim, I find it cool that you are able to stay so genki in such troubling situations. You are a much stronger person that most of the people I know. I guess you have to be now. Oh and just to let you know, the cover boy on your blog is the only member of Linkin Park that I like. Even though some of the music may not rock my world, I have to admit that he is a very talented singer.

And you are sooo lucky to be going to a con. I hope you bring back some nice Sorashi items that might help give you more inspiration for your AU or Y/S/A. I can't believe I actually see that as a plausible couple/threesome now. I have been corrupted. ^^

Yours and my kitties make the best inspiration for the X charas as kitties. =P Particularly the Que. Such a skinny little nutcase. He's fun to be around when he's not having his...issues.

Whoa, social bloggin is getting more extensive all the time. More proof that I have no life outside the net. Sad, isn't it?

 
Yes, I know my Mircea Eliade GW rant is late. I swear I'll do it tomorrow. I'm just having so much fun actually writing a fanfic. You know, I think I finally have realized what people find so engaging about them, aside from just reading them. Unfortunately, it appears that I have gotten into this far too late as most of my favorite writers are pulling out on me due to...well...reasons. But I have realized something else. Personally, I don't care if I get any reviews for my fanfic because you know why I'm writing? Because I think it's damn funny and I'm having fun mocking things, creating my own scenarios, and just in general being a twit. I usually do this when I write original fiction and it's always been great because there's no specific rules I have to follow or people I have to cater to.

I've realized the same thing can apply to fanfiction. I mean seriously, why do fanfiction writers write? Because it's fun. They (now we, I guess) want to amuse themselves and a few friends. If anyone likes it, that's a nice perk. But it shouldn't be necessary. I personally plan on making my X ficlet long because I want to play with it for as long as I can. I want to try out different scenarios and work with as many characters as possible. And I know I have seriously warped some characters. And I really don't care because it's just for fun. I mean, even though some of us may wish it every single day, we don't write the storyline for anime/manga so why should we try to make people analyze what we write by rationalizing it or arguing it. I am aware that I am being very hypocritical since I am ranting about fandoms during other bloggins. But I have fun with those too. So naaaah! I mean, "ships"/"pairings"/"couples"/"flavors" whatever you choose to call them are a blast to play with, but they are not our lives. (At least, I hope not.)

I really wish people could just enjoy fandom for what it's supposed to be: people gushing over characters and discussing elements with other fans. Not fighting! Not criticizing! Not RL obsession! I miss old fandom. It was cool back then. People got along. But I guess human nature will always see to it that people will want their way and their way alone because the human beast is naturally greedy in one way or another. So fandoms will always turn on each other and eventually drive people away. Some fandoms manage to survive because of the semi-obscurity of their obsession. With others, the love just gradually fades to simple respect/adoration. But for the most part, fandoms always become violent and fierce to the point where the fun itself just fades to irritation. It's a common fact. I have gotten used to it, having experienced the rise and fall of many a fandom. If you truly love something though, it will always be special to you, even if you chose not to share it with others anymore. You can enjoy it by yourself and be content. It may not be as interactive as fandom but at least you can still enjoy it.

Just for the record, X may have the shittiest story-line and the world and I'd still love it as long as it had its characters. When they go, then I may give up on it. Same with Digimon, same with Buffy, same with most other things I watch/read. I have always neglected full participation in any fandom because that includes taking sides and I am a very undecided person. I like whatever seems most interesting, no matter how wrong, evil, cutesy, or common it is. So my preferences always change.

On that note: Why did I start my Sorashi page? Because I liked it and was mostly collecting stories for myself! It was for ME! I never knew it would gain so many followers, though I am elated about that. It was just one of those "Hey I think this is cool. How about you? Let's enjoy it together" sort of things. I mean, after all isn't that what fandom is SUPPOSED to be about? *sighs*

Done now.

 
Revamped my Sessions AKA (Life at the Start of the Millenium) at ffnet. *looks back at old title* Ugh! What was I on? Anyway, I put up the final version which was submitted and rejected by the Intermediate Fiction Workshop. I don't care what they think. I like it so they can just kiss my ass! =P

I also added the prologue to my new X ficlet. I don't know about it, but these people seem to like it so far. I guess it can't be that bad. And it's kind of tough to come close to some of the horrendous fics that wind up on ffnet. My favorite part is definitely the end though. *squeezes Sei-chan muse* You make such a cute neko! All covered in sakura and stuff. Though still not as cute as crack-kitty Subaru-neko or rolly polly Sora-neko. I need to write their parts soon. Maybe if I get more time this week.

Also added my newest short story to ffnet. Rules of Engagment Boys and horsies. Where can one go wrong?

I have to go fix the damn financial block that my mother PROMISED me that she had handled. -_-

Now, I'm off to work on econ problem set due tomorrow. Maybe I should have taken those notes on Chp.12 off the net like I kept meaning to. Whoopsie!

 
Hmm, should I give Fuuma-neko his frog in the fic?

Damn, I just realized that I have to make about 18 copies of my short story for my class sometime tomorrow and that's probably going to cost me a lot since the darn thing is 15 pages. Have I mentioned how much I hate college. -_-

 
//being serenaded by: “It's a Dangerous Game” from Jekyll and Hyde Yes, I am addicted. So what!//

Well, I finally finished the prologue of my x-kitty fic. I want a Sei-neko. I might post it on the otherdragon blog later. If I think it's decent enough, I might even post it on ffnet along with that short story I wrote last week.

But this also means that I might actually have time to work on my Psychosis after work and after my econ problem set is done. >< But I will have to wait to do my Mircea Eliade Pt.3 Gundam Wing until tomorrow afternoon. Maybe I can work more on the first chapter of the x-kitty fic then too. I'd work on it tonight, but I have a feeling that Luce and Erik are gonna kill me if I don't pay some attention to them soon. I WILL get Chp.37 done by this week if it kills me. At the very least, I plan to work on completing it this weekend. Now that I have my new background music and image songs set up for the characters, I will have the ideal writing music to work with.

 
BTW, I'm gonna try to have the next part of my rant series up on Tuesday, but I have a registration appointment so I don't know.

 
Now, I'm tired. I need to catch up on netting. Oh and one more thing. If I hear one more bitch/bastard insult either Sorata or Arashi, I'm going to get royally pissed. I am a slash fan. I love S/S, F/K, and even a touch of F/Kyou. But when people seem to think that their characters are so godly that all other characters shouldn't even have the right to have some screen time, I get a little annoyed. To make a long story short, I LIKE Fuuma. I do. I think evil Fuuma is ultra-cool and his sadistic games with Kamui are amusing. BUT I also love other characters such as Sorata, Arashi, Seishirou, and Yuuto. I do not let my completely disgusting and utterly nerve-wracking obsession with any of these characters make me DESPISE any other characters. Well, except for Subaru. But that's only X Subaru and that's a rant for next week anyway. I see the whole picture and don't wish death on any character. Maybe I'm just undecided. Who knows? But seriously, if I can still enjoy the intrigue of Fuuma despite the fact that he completely offed my FAVORITE CHARACTER EVER, I don't see why anybody else can't just leave certain characters the fuck alone!!! Yes, you are entitled to your own opinion and so am I. I don't mind if you wanna play Boy-Bands with the X-boys. Just don't destroy the other characters in the process. Even if those character's were poorly handled in the anime. Personally, I think Subaru was as dull as dirt in the anime. His best and most interesting ep was 'Slaughter' and only because Sei-chan was around.

 
Well, here's hoping my powerpoint presentation actually works tomorrow. And as soon as my god-awful research paper workshop is done, I might actually get to do some...writing. Yes, I wrote my short story and it was as fun as I could make it (being that it didn't have any of my favorite charas to write about), but I want to write for MYSELF just a little bit. School won't let me. I hate college!

I didn't even get to have a decent weekend. It started out fine with me picking up the first CCS movie, a CCS volume, a Kenshin tape, GTO (better than I thought it'd be), and some Saiyuki (that anime sooo kicks ass!). Then I went and bought some new posters as I always do whenever I am in Pandora's too long. A cute DNAngel with Satoshi and Daisuke as well as their alter-egos, a pic of Dark and Krad almost necking, and a lovely Saiyuki bondage boys poster. My Dad dubbed that one because of all the chains and lack of closed shirts. I thought about buying X: First Contact and then decided...with the pictures it offered, it was not worth my limited cash flow. ^^ Oh, I also picked up Gravi subs but was unable to watch them. I heard they were Chinese-translations and inserted "shit" in at strange moments in dialogue.

Then, I went on search for my newest obsession. Thanks to someone mentioning Broadway again, Nayami felt compelled to drive down to the mall and pick up the Jekyll and Hyde soundtrack. I did. So I got home to listen to it and....."ARGH! What the fuck is this shit?" Meaning, I got the wrong album. It was such crap. It completely destroyed "This is the Moment." So I was pissed again.

Then, the computer would only load for 5 minutes everytime because I now live in the exact center of NOWHERE! The boys wouldn't quit playing their damned GT3 long enough for me to watch my anime. I never got to watch the CCS movie or Kenshin and I only watched the first episode of GTO. My brother also managed to spill milk all over me and then blame it on my cousin instead of getting me a towel. I tried to get my family members to read my short story. My mother got to page 4 so did my cousin. I guess nobody cares. ;_; Dad has to listen when I read things because I force him to. He liked it so that makes me feel better.

Sat, they promised they'd take me shopping. Well, we went to a mall. I found the REAL Jekyll and Hyde cd. I found some VERY expensive clothes in this one store, but my mom refused to wait in line. BTW, she was paying with my money since she owes me 600 dollars. Before we went shopping, we had to go down and buy her new car, which I adore. It's a silver Subaru Forester and it's not god ugly. Course, it's way too expensive for her to buy when her house is having septic problems. Priorities, mother. -_-

The highlight of my weekend was sitting down and listening to my new Broadway cd while watching Six Feet Under. I think it's so precious that that spaz David FINALLY realized he was in love with Keith. But I feel bad for his new boyfriend because I really think he loves David. Oh and the boys' aunt is FREAKY. She's gonna drag Claire off to an artist colony. Run Claire! Nate needs to kick David in the head for even thinking about selling the funeral home.

BTW, I do soooo love Jekyll and Hyde. Most of its songs have now gone on my most listened to list including "Facade," "Bitch, Bitch, Bitch," "Alive," "His Work and Nothing More," "Murder Murder," "The Girls of the Night," "The World Has Gone Insane," and "Confrontation." Of course, my ultimate favorite is "It's a Dangerous Game." Sultry, wicked, twisted love song gone horribly horribly wrong...How delightful! And it's soo pretty too.

Anyway, I finally got to go shopping for real. First, I was dragged to K-Mart for its Out Of Business sale. I got maybe 4 things and we spent 2 hours there. Then, we were off to Fashion Bug. That brought us some success. On to Khol's. Good god, who can afford those prices? Michael's and Johann's...Mom wants a rod for her Egyptian tapestry she bought off the net. Strange woman.

There was much more hideousness involved with the weekend involving my aunt, grandmother, evil cousin who thinks that I'm the "Dark Evil Mistress" for some ungodly reason. But it's over with and not worth discussing. Let's just say that I got absolutely nothing done, managed to convince my little brother that my original fiction is sadistic ("But you can't kill him. He's cool. He beats people up."), and had to finish my powerpoint presentation in 3 hours.

 
IT'S TIME TO BE SOCIABLE!!!!

Damn it, Kim! Your preview mp3s got me completely hooked on the Jekll and Hyde musical and now I feel as if I must rush out and buy the soundtrack to add to my list of other Broadways faves, mainly RENT and Les Mis. I think I've even heard "Bring on the Men" before. One of my HS friends, Jonathan who's a huge fan of all sorts of Broadway, used to play it constantly in his car whenever he was giving me rides. He even sang along and was able to capture the inflection and everything. 0_o Well, Jonathan always had a very...strange taste in favorite songs to sing to. *thinks of "Out Tonight" (RENT) "Today for You" (RENT) "Let Me Entertain You" (Gypsy) and "Sandra Dee" (Grease). But I must say that "This is the Moment" was a new listening experience for me and I luuurved it. *runs to bank to get money for soundtrack*

Argustar, I seriously am working on that Clamp Kitty Campus ficlet. It's such BS right now, but I hope to have something decent by the time I get back to school on Sunday.

As for YOU, I shall be paying Pandora's a visit very soon. I'll see if a can pick up a certain set of tapes. Unfortunately, I am very busy this weekend so don't know if I'll be able to watch them with you. *sigh*

Scan more. Goth Arashi was great!

Oh be still my heart! Can it actually be new chapters of Stained Glass Windows? *genki hops* It is! It is! Heh heh! Poor Jesse. ^_^ Must have more. Whoever nags the distinguished authoress for this series should definitely pester her more often. We can't spend all our time with the screw-happy X boys, now can we? Other charas need lovings too. Nicky is a much more interesting character than fandom Kamui or Fuuma any day of the week. And beat it XSubaru! I want Andy!

Emiko-chan, where's that new story you've been promising us? I want to see some of your 'new improved style.'

Umm...I think that's about it. My head hurts. Oh and I wrote another short story. This one is set in medieval times and is all about two of the ancestors of my original charas. If you read, you can guess which two, though the names make it painfully obvious as do the personalities. It also includes cutesy scenes with horsies. So what if Cadell and Arlen want to kill each other? What do you expect? Considering whose ancestors they are.

I guess this means I have to work on my Hissing Cockroach project on my mom's new computer. I also have to finish reading that damn Briton Hadden book. I can't believe his only major contribution to journalism was pissing off his partner, Henry Luce, so much that he defied him every chance he got and revolutionized the world of magazines through Time. Basically, all journalist owe the Luce Enterprise to Hadden being a dick. ^^

 
Totally fucked up Asian Art History Exam. The damn professor made it a timed test and I can't finish any essay in just 10 MINUTES! I also forgot all the dates because of everything else in scholastic matters, dates of anything have always been my worst, especially when I'm supposed to remember dynasties. Look, all you're getting from me people is RG VEDA, Shang, Zhou, and Buddhist. That's as much dating as I can remember. Damn you test! I studied you for 2 hours and I still suck!

Why? Why? All I want to do is fucking write! I haven't even gotten to the angst yet and I still want to have my lovers' quarrel in the courtyard. (Cross-dressers and bisexuals apparently don't get along too well in my world.) I also just encountered a really odd problem that I'm going to have to deal with someone with one of my characters. I guess this means it's back to the plot board. *sigh* And I still have to fix all my mistakes on Chps. 34-36. With some great amount of surprise luck, I just might be able to write on...Thursday.

Oh and I got a great audio of the Madagascar Hissing Cockroach. 'Nuff said.

 
S/S oekaki!!! It's about friggin' time someone remembered these two darlings when they were together and still interesting. You know, waaaay back in that forgotten tome known as Tokyo Babylon. When they had...oooh...personality!!!! *holds up little TB flags and waves madly* This pic is so fluffy and very very wrong. ^_^ I would like to bow down and worship this artist. Maybe later.....

Now back to the studying for Asian Art History Mid-term and working on Entomology. Guess no writing will be getting done....again. -_- College blows! A lot....

 
Note: You must read the top explanation of this first if you want to understand the main gist of this rant.

Fanon vs. Canon:
Mircea Eliade
Style

CASE 2: Card Captor Sakura

--Eriol/Tomoyo? WTF?--

Ah yes, we probably all know what I'm going to rant about here. It's the classic case of a way to avoid shojuo ai meets something that people think is a cute idea. Because let's face it, we all know that Eriol/Tomoyo has little to no evidence in the story. Though it's just fanfiction and one can argue that people should be allowed to write whatever the hell they want, which I fully support by the way. There exists one fanon aspect about this pairing that drives me insane! This is a element that rears its head in many a fanfic of all different fandoms (think GW). It's been dubbed 'The Third Wheel Concept.'

What exactly is 'The Third Wheel Concept?' Well, it's when you take three characters who are really good friends with each other and have been or eventually fall madly in love with each other. In the end, the 'third wheel' is left all on their own while the other two run off to live happily ever after. Yes, this may seem cruel. But many pieces of fiction (published/broadcasted) do this all the time because the facts of life are that everyone can't be happy. Not everyone can be in love with the one they want. Sometimes, people just have to accept the true feelings of the one they care deeply for. Now you're all saying, "But this is fiction. Everybody should be able to have their dreams come true if they want them to." To this I say, in the word's of a certain angsty character who shall remain nameless since he has completely destroyed all respect I had for him (but that's another rant altogether), "There's no way to make everyone happy." Well, maybe if you have a threeway, but that's a different case. =P

Anyway, though 'The Third Wheel Concept' is terribly upsetting, it doesn't even compare to the fanon that it has produced. Fans feel bad for the characters left out so they seek to pair them up with another lone character as a sort of consolation prize. Now is this really fair to either character? In some cases it could work, if the fanfic author shows how the characters grow to love each other. Sadly, this is rarely the case and people just seem keen to throw two characters together just because THEY CAN. Now, of course, some may argue, "Why can't they just have sex?" This can work in many fandoms, but it is hard to pull off in CCS unless you rapid-age the characters at least five or six years. When it pisses me off, is when it's not just sex and it's not just for fun and it's supposed to be considered completely in-character.

And yes, there is no case that aggravates me more than that of Eriol/Tomoyo. One, just for starters, let's talk facts. Yes, I know the dreaded CANON. "RUN! We are the fanfic writers. Canon holds no domain over us." Bear with me, okay? Tomoyo loves Sakura. I don't care if she is 10 or 16, she does. Clamp makes that incredibly obvious. She follows her around all day with a video camera, she idolizes her, she tries to help her get anything she wants, she helps her with her problems, and she's willing to sacrifice her happiness for Sakura's. Tomoyo mentions the last part so many times amongst the manga and the anime. It's a major part of her character and what makes so many people think of her as an impressive figure. Though she cares deeply for her friend, she knows that she must eventually let her go because Sakura will never her see her the same way. (Unless you count those Sakura/Tomoyo's which are actually rare. o_0) I mean, Tomoyo even tries to help Li realize how he feels about Sakura. She can on occasion play matchmaker. ^^ She's such a sweetheart.

As for Eriol...well, I won't lie my information on him is less developed than Tomoyo's since he comes later in the series/manga. But I know that he is already engaged to...well, we won't discuss that. Yuck! I also know that Eriol is merely the reincarnation of one part of Clow Reed. His main purpose is to test the child who now holds his powers. Though he can be a sweet kid at times (very rare times), he seems to be fairly indifferent to those around him. That's not necessarily a bad thing. It's just that he doesn't really relate to them. (Though Eriol/Li is oh-so cute! ^_^)

The thing here is that there is very little reason for either of these characters to be drawn to each other without creating another set of experiences for them. Even then, it does cause Tomoyo to lose some of her strength as a character because in many cases of this pairing, Tomoyo is known to turn to Eriol only because she knows that Sakura loves Li. It's just a convenience relationship. There are a few exceptions to this rule. (After the Fall) In other words, Tomoyo choses to be with Eriol as a sort of second-option. This doesn't seem very in her character since in essence, it is lying to herself and Tomoyo does not do such a thing. As stated before, the strongest part of her character is her willingness to see to the happiness of others at all costs. If you just have her hook up with another characters, it cheapens her sacrifice. I know it may sound mean, but it does.

Now there's the other explanation behind the Eriol/Tomoyo pairing. Because we can never have her be a homosexual female. Oh nooooooo! Nobody in CCS is gay. They are all just really good friends. And Yukito loves Sakura? Didn't y'all know? This is such a friggin' cop-out. If this is a reason why someone writes this type of fanfiction, they need a severe beating with Argustar's "Clue stick."© And no, I don't buy the 'CardCaptors' excuse! Anyway, in this scenario, the two are paired together because they are considered the only guy-girl pairing left. Why do they love each other? Who the hell cares? It's just important that Tomoyo be with a guy!!!

The saddest thing about this type of fanon is that is it not seeking to explain something as with most aspects of fanon, but rather it exists to cover up something else. It disregards the knowledge that it already there. This is like Mircea Eliade's theory in reverse. It goes from knowledge to ritual. In this case, the more knowledge there is on a certain unsavory aspect, the more people wish to resort to ritual to avoid that knowledge.

Yes, this is a type of denial. Whether you're denying that Tomoyo loves Sakura or you're denying that Tomoyo cannot be truly happy with anyone else. It is not really about misinterpretation or misunderstaning. It is simply the wish to ignore what has been given. And as with all cases of denial, there is a sacrifice for taking away what should be there. Even with denials of the best intentions (X, Escaflowne, TB, Vamp Chrons {sometimes} fics), there is still some part of the character that will be lost by denying an aspect of their lives, be it death, marriage, lost love, or their human nature. This is a risk that all denial fics take. Only with the case of Eriol/Tomoyo, the loss in character is devastating.

So, let's stop and think why you write the pairing. Are you prepared to support it with evidence that you shall create? Are you willing to acknowledge that you will be taking away a bit of Tomoyo's respect? Do you just believe that everyone should be happy? Do they just look cute together and need explanation whatsoever because they're a heterosexual couple? Once you've decided your reason for using this pairing in your writing, maybe then you will be more able to understand the characters you're working with and just how you want others to interpret them.

~end Case 2~

Next week: GW--3x4? 4x3? Who says how it is?

 
//being serenaded by: “Space Between” by Dave Matthews Band. This is my newest love song favorite. A relationship based on lies. Constant confusion. The desire to fix things. Awww! I think Nayami has found her newest image song.//

Well, it's almost time to get back to ranting, but before I do I would just like to say that last Sunday has spun my world into this annoying depression. It's not even that sad, it's just annoying now. Yes, it was all induced by watching the final eps of Xtv. Sorata's death had me balling like a baby and though I really really don't like Kamui, I felt damn upset when he died. The whole ending just bothered me. Not that it wasn't good, it was just...dark. Of course, it's X.

But that's not the only problem. Apparently, my good muses, especially the ever ambitious Psychic Inuki decided that severe depression and death would be a good way to end a story. So while I altered some things to prevent complete anguish, I still see that the ending I have planned out is going to be upsetting. But I guess I can try to fix everything in the sequel. And why the hell am I writing the ending anyway when I'm still on Chp.37? Oh well, I guess I can change it if I decide it won't work out. There's still plenty more chapters to go. But I do soo want to include my adorable little poem I made up yesterday for my mini-notebook. It's chock full of foreshadowing and forced rhymmies. ^^ Heh, maybe I'll put it up on my writing blog as soon as I get around to making one. Nayami is far too lazy nowadays. I still have to write my reviews for x21-24. Though I think I will be taking a break from Xtv discussion for a while, seeing as how it will just give me more ideas for ruining the happiness of my characters.

 

Take theWhat Fanfic Draco are YOU? test and find out!
"You are Irresistible Poison!Draco. The hero of the most beloved slash fanfic of all time, you have angst galore, and plenty of wry wit to go along. You're intelligent, but often impulsive, and this can lead to mass confusion. Fortunately, you have Harry to help you. And thousands of readers on your side."

Damn straight! ^__________^

 
Stupid post!

 
Alas, I am outdone again. My collage doesn't even compare to the skill and beauty of this on the improved fanart page. Well, what should I expect from one of the best Sorashi fanartists? The only thing I find better than this piece is the lovely piece proves that the A-shirt can actually look good.

Ugh! Hungry...should probably eat something. *looks at Chinese noodles in refrigerator* Dang....

 
Nayami is in pure heaven and worshiping as she has never worshiped before.
Yes, this is about X, so :P

First, there are my two new Demi-gods, Kurot and Dragonlady. Kurot did the most kick-ass Fuuma/Kamui pic that I have seen in some time. It brings back the old F/K girl in me. *huggles piccie* And Dragonlady is one of the most astonishing Sorashi fanartists I have seen in some time. She is even willing to do requests and so far has already done one for me. I wish I could talk to her through IM instead of just email all the time. I would love to introduce her to the rest of the "rabid" Sorashi fans. ^^

And now for my new god:

----JEHZ-SAMA!---

This is the only writer I've seen who can actually pull off Fuuma/Kamui decently, while managing to stay true to all the characters. Ooooh I really hope she finishes Those Who Fall Before God! She even manages to include Sorashi and have them be more than just a couple thrown in on the side. Though their scenes are few, they are very well done. But here's the most amazing thing, I actually LIKE Kamui in this fic and Fuuma rocks! And Subaru is actually complex for once. He's not just there or off being a depressed skank.

I will be updating my links accordingly. Too tired to do social blogging today since I've been working on my webpage and researching all day. I didn't even get time to work on my Chp.37 yet (Erik and Luce are going to be pi~issed at me) and I actually know everything I want to do with it for once. Well, the next part of the fanon vs. canon rant will hopefully be ready to go by Tuesday.

 
And now for my newest piece of ranting fun, known as:

Fanon vs. Canon:
Mircea Eliade
Style

What this will consist of is a five-piece rant, featuring arguments for elements in the fandoms of Yami no Matsuei, Card Captor Sakura, Gundam Wing, X, and the general uke/seme clichés. I would like to say that this is not a bashing of any particular person and if you happen to work within any of the realms or with any of the topics that I may be condemning in this selection, please remember that this is just MY opinion and I have the right to say whatever I want. Most of this basically deal with how fandoms interpret
characters or relationships.

I. Introduction to Mircea Eliade's Thesis:

This entire rant is based upon a theory I encountered in my History of Asian Art class. In essence, what the theory says is that "Knowledge is inversely proportionate to ritual." For the class, this theory was used to explain why certain societies developed the art form that they did. Now granted, this is just my interpretation of the theory, but I see it as meaning that the more knowledge you have, the less you have to work within someone else's ideas. In other words, once something is a fact, there is no reason to have any particular faith in its existence because it has been proven to be true. Faith in many situations involves accepting something without any concrete evidence of its validity.

Before I show how this relates to fandom, I'd like to present the argument between science and religion and how this theory can apply to it. As stated before, religion is based on faith in something usually without proof. This can involve faith in the presence of a higher power or faith in a certain creationist theory. Science would naturally contradict this because science is all about facts and knowledge. Read: things that have been proven either through math or experimentation. Religion and science are often at ends because scientists have no reason to really "believe" in anything because everything they know is a uncontestable fact. With religion, people are working with a 'ritual.' They are following the beliefs of someone else long before them because they have no absolute knowledge as to the meaning of life or other metaphysical topics.

When there is little knowledge, people are forced to repeat things exactly as everyone else because in their limited scope, that is the only way that things will work out properly. As knowledge increases, this need for 'ritual' fades and people are left with nothing but facts.

II. Application of Thesis

These facts are what fiction fans of all kinds (movies, books, video games, manga, anime) known as 'CANON'. Canon is what is supported in the actual work. What has been shown to be true and cannot be argued. Still, there is room for interpretation and speculation. That is the major reason, aside from the good ol' "DENIAL FACTOR," of fanfiction. When something has not been completely explained, there is not enough knowledge for fans to work with so they are left to create/develop their own knowledge and truths. And this is what is affectionately called 'FANON.'

So what's wrong with fanon? Absolutely nothing. It's fun to develop a whole new spin on things that cannot be proven or explained. For example, it's interesting to speculate where Watari (YnM) got his owl, whether Trowa (GW) was sexually assaulted, whether Lupin and Sirius (Harry Potter) were in a relationship, whether Angel (Buffy the Vampire Slayer) can have sex with a hooker and not lose his soul, whether Zell (FFVIII) is Cloud and Tifa's (FFVII) child, which by the way is my own favorite speculation. I could go on forever. Yes, fanon allows people to devise their own truths and fill in the gaps that the works' creators leave in the story.

So if I have nothing against fanon, then what's the point of this rant? Well, that refers to the more common sort of fanon. The fanon where fans take one person's opinion on an unknown fact and assume it as their own. In turn, more fans borrow this idea and integrate it into their fanwork. Eventually, you have a whole following of people believing in something so when a new fan appears, he/she only hears of the 'fanon' and makes the mistake of accepting it as 'canon.' You'd be surprised how often this can occur. Think for a second of my favorite example of this: Christian Duo. Where is it ever implied that this character believes in this religion? Yes, he wears a cross, but so do many unchristian people. Nowadays, a cross is seen as a piece of aesthetic design. It doesn't have to signify a definite belief in anything. I guess now, those of you reading this (whoa! I admire your decision) are starting to see what I mean by fanon being 'abused.'

Well, now that the preliminaries are done with, on to the main event. This week's focus:

CASE 1: Yami no Matsuei

--Is Hisoka a Submissive Character?--

Poor little Hisoka, either abhorred by the masses or turned into a spineless wimp mainly used as a plot device. This has always annoyed me. It seems like just an excuse for people to get Tsuzuki into the role of the benevolent protector, guarding his helpless lamb. Sure, Tsuzuki is a nice guy and does look out for Hisoka and comfort him when he needs it. But Hisoka is not helpless!

Why do people see Hisoka as so pathetically weak in most fanfiction? Well, there's the whole Muraki thing. I guess it is hard to see a person who most likely got raped as a child as someone who could be strong and assertive. But then again, Tsuzuki is often the sensei's prey as well and fans manage to see him as someone who can protect and fight for his loved ones. Then, there's the fact that Hisoka is eternally 16 yrs old and therefore a helpless child. Hisoka does have his many childish moments, including his blushing, his temper, and his inability to handle liquor ^^, but he also has his stronger moments.

Who confronted Muraki when he was harassing Tsuzuki on the ship during the King of Swords Arc? (Though Hisoka was definitely meaner about this in the manga) Who posed as Hijiri to distract demon-Tsuzuki during the Devil's Trill arc? Who sparred with Oriya to get Muraki's keycard during the Kyoto Arc? Who told Tsubaki-hime exactly what he thought of Muraki and even stabbed his own hand to get his point across? Who was able to shoot Tsubaki to end her suffering? Who entered a falling building in order to save Tsuzuki near the end of the series? To me, these look like the actions of a strong-willed character who could hold his own against most situations, except maybe with Muraki. But come on, who CAN stand up to Muraki? Maybe Tatsumi--but he's the only one.

And Hisoka doesn't NEED to be coddled all the time. He can handle some things on his own. Besides, Hisoka is still growing up in his mind at least. He won't be 'fragile' forever. Manga Hisoka even has his own shikigami, as pathetic as it may be. That aside, Hisoka CAN come to terms with difficult things on his own. He was the one who informed Tsuzuki that Muraki wasn't dead near the end of the Kyoto Arc and he did try to help Tsuzuki see that he was still human despite everything. And let's not forget that Hisoka did have a rather abusive childhood with his own family. He probably had to adapt and toughen up at some time so he can't be that 'fragile.'

In general, I think it is this 'submissive' stereotype of Hisoka that makes so many Tsu/H stories seem cliché and boring at times. Sadly, this need for one character to be completely dependent on the other character is a trait seen far too much in fanfiction. It is just the 'yaoi' answer for the "Damsel in distress" situation. Someone always needs to be protected. It's impossible for two close characters to have the ability to stand on their own two feet.

What is the reason for this cliché? Simple, the abuse of fanon. People cannot understand Hisoka's character because he seems to contradict himself. He suffers from emotional trauma yet projects a very cold demeanor. He seeks out comfort yet also feels the need to comfort others. He's terrified of Muraki and yet vehemently desires to confront him and win against him. The problem here is that the facts are too hard to reason with, so the truth of his character seems convoluted. Since there is no understandable knowledge, people have to use 'ritual' to create their own. One person says Hisoka is 'in need of constant comfort,' which is his/her interpretation of his character. Another agrees since he/she doesn't get his character either. Eventually, there is a whole chunk of people who have accepted this belief and use it frequently in their writing. (Want proof? Check out ffnet.) Those who haven't read manga/seen series, take this belief to heart and to them, it becomes 'canon.' Then when another writer suggests the existence of a assertive and strong Hisoka, they get ignored for not following the bandwagon. *shakes head*

So I guess everyone's free to interpret this character as they wish? But for once, just before you decide to go along with 'ritual,' maybe you should ask yourself if you truly understand the character? Maybe you need to take another look at the 'facts' before you fall into the realm of 'fanon.'

~end Case 1~

Next week: CCS --- Eriol/Tomoyo (ummm...no)

 
Quickie rant before larger bloggins'. I would seriously kill for some Six Feet Under fanfiction. I would read anything just about now. Well, except for Nate/Brenda who, though being an interesting couple and fun to watch, would make a terribly cliche read. Personally anything concerning the lives of either Claire or David would make my day.

Of course, I know this means that some poor referer will probably venture to my site, hoping to find Six Feet Under fanfiction because of the keywords. But oh well! This is the only way I know how to ask for something. And so far, whining on my blog has yielded me everything I wanted from Yami no Matsuei, ex dream, Sorashi fans, and other miscellaneous necessities. So here's hoping this works.

 
Oh, I added Jamie of the Subliminal Messages fame in lame hopes that she will finally answer my email and let me use her old Sorashi fanart. Wow, I didn't know she was a Forever Knight fan too.

 
I'm thinking of making a writing blog, but I'm too lazy to try right now. Dang, I could try to put fanfiction in it as well. *shakes head and walks off mumbling incoherently*

 
It's time for the dreaded SOCIAL BLOGGING.

BTW, Emi-chan, Ghost World is nice as long as you don't get obsessed such as a certain someone. Also that whole avoidant disorder post so reminds me of Nicky.

Keri, it's good to see that you are kind of feeling better. Fighting with good friends can really suck.

I know Kouri probably never reads my blog, but I am seriously going through And I Will Touch the Sky withdrawal. I need more of the sequel. Must have more Andy. Screw X fanfic charas. (definitely not literally ><), I need more Stained Glass Windows. Pleaaaase write! *huggles Andy and 'Nicky'*

Taryn, your April Fool's joke totally had me since I sooo wanted With A Slash to be up again. Well, I guess it is hard given your computer programs. Oh yeah, I love the Dir en Grey layout. I don't really like much of their music but their PV's are great. PS, you're soo lucky to have ep.24.

We so need to write that MR/X *remembers picturing Yuuto and Sei-chan doing the "Like a Virgin" scene* and Star Wars/X crossover. ^_^ And our CCS/X IF last night was beyond fun.

"Keiichi: I must video tape Kamui being angsty and trying to save the world. If only the earthquakes would stop screwing up the taping.
Keiichi: But, Shiro-kun! You'd look so *cute* in this outfit! ^__^
Kamui: I am SO NOT wearing that!
*Kamui ends up dressed up in Sakura's pink neko costume*
Sorata: Well, I *said* that we'd win from beauty alone . . . . . . . . That wasn't exactly what I meant, though. -_-;;
Yuzu: Awww, I think you look cute, Kamui-chan. *holds up pocky*
Sorata: But, make something special for Arashi, and we'll call it even! ^__^
Arashi: Oh no, keep me out of this. *gives her classic deadpan expression and briskly walks away*"

One word for YOU, WRITE!

And as for you, oh covetor of illegal Gravitation rental tapes, how dare you use that hideous word in context with my name! You don't want me to break out 'ghettotabulous', do you?

 
//being serenaded by: “In the End” by Linkin Park. It reminds me of Xenogears
so I like it despite the fact that it is obviously weenie rock. It also would make a good
image song for one of my original charas. Maybe Tye either near the end of the first book
or throughout the sequel.//

Well, the Intermediate Fiction was a no go. Even the really snobby and elevated student
in my writing class failed to impress the submission people. Well, there’s always next
year. I think I’m writing a pure slash next time. They can suck on that!

Aside from those gripes, my Jour test wasn’t a major failure. I actually pulled off a 92
even though I refused to give the professor a single date for the history part. I just wowed
her with my endless display of trivial nonsense that I spent 5 hours memorizing the night
before. Hopefully my Asian Art paper went as well, but I doubt it. I even convinced the
Jour teacher to help me out on her term paper so that’s a good thing.

My school won the National College Basketball Championship last night and managed to
destroy a bike shop, cop cars, and had a fire that lasted an hour or so. I hid in my room
and tried to do my Creative Writing homework (which wasn’t even collected and I stayed
up until 4 writing it and got only 3 hours of sleep! DAMMIT!). Luckily my failure to get
into the selective writing class doesn’t completely crush my spirit. I just love writing too
much to give up that easily.

Speaking of writing, I finally have muses for the first time ever. They include Sei-chan
with Shikigami Mokona and of course, Pyschic Inuki-chan. So far, Mokona is in charge
of romance and fluff, Sei-chan helps with violence and fighting (good, I need ideas for
that), and dear Inuki-chan is my angst expert. Why? Because he has to hear everybody
else’s troubles so he knows a few things about misery. I just have to make sure he doesn’t
chase around Shiki-Mokona. Well, I guess he has to stay away from the Sakura tree to
begin with.
Dang, and now my pesky original charas are causing a racket inside my head. They are such glory hounds.

Luce: Ooooh, can I play with Shiki-Mokona?
Nayami: No!
Luce: Aww! Can I at least play with Sei-chan?
Nayami: No! He’s not your type.
Luce: Damn. I guess that means all that’s left is that freaky inugami. He can hang with
Nicky.
Nicky: Screw you!
Nayami: Never mind the boys. They’re just snippy because I haven’t been paying much
attention to them lately and the only attention they have been getting involves them
getting their asses kicked.
Luce: Yeah! What’s up with that shit?
Nayami: This is where muses that are either all-powerful, extremely scary, or just plain
versatile come in handy.
Shiki-Mokona: *Puu puu* *leaps from Sei-chan’s shoulder and chases off Psychosis
boys*

I think Buffy comes on tonight but I'm afraid to watch now. Damn spoilers!